Getting More Settled Down

Yea.... after some ups and downs (in the mood department), I can feel myself slowly getting back to the old momentum, i.e. to work and work. afterall, having gone on a "defiant strike" from work, its time to pick up the pieces and get back to proper agenda, i.e. making money. It is not CATHERINE to only care about my own temperament and ignore the livelihoods of many others. Hence, work still must go on.

Maybe I am getting impatient? Or... maybe its a form of nervous-ness? I just cant seem to pinpoint what is exactly "wrong" with me? Over what, u may ask. Actually, over many things. Work is certainly one of it. Its coming 8 yrs since we started Leadz. Yes, we are doing great in recent years. Not enough to declare millionaires, but thankful enough for seeing thru "not-too-bad" kinda living standards. But, my guts seem to have gone on a World Tour, and I am not sure when will this vagabond returns to settle down. Expansion plans are constantly in our minds. But, the energy to see thru the plans, is the major factor. With Gwen still young, i hardly think I have enough time nor the right frame of mind to conjure the future. Also, I cant risk having all eggs in the basket, being unprotected. I liken myself as a mother hen, always worrying about the eggs, if they will hatch well to become fine chickens one day, or will they suffer?

Well, the plan now is to let nature takes its course and of cos, with some helping hands, to take risk at the right time.


Besides work, i also find myself getting more settled down as well... actually, its more like on the contrary kinda thing. I find my "peaceful" lifestyle interrupted. I am not sure if I like this kind of interruptions, but i certainly am not against it. My mood has been yoyo-ing for the past few months. Somehow, rebellious me seemed to want to 'prove" something. Prove what huh? I also dun understand myself. Maybe things have been pretty stagnant and i do need some excitement. Gosh, the way I am describing and the way others perceive if they do read this post, seem to suggest that I am trying to "do somethhing really naughty'. Halt your sick thots. I am merely thinking that I need to be a little more daring than I already am. Doing things that I used to do when I was young, and somehow, stopped, becos I am a wife and a mother now? Hahahaha!!! Outrageous acts that hb knows and yet I havent been doing?

OK... just chatted with darling sel. time to analyse a bit. Hope i wun get overly affected like i did few months ago. Damn! I am just so cut-out for this role. Sigh